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Thread: Najbolji vicevi (skromno zar ne?)

  1. #8601
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    A ne no Nade Blam...
    Svaki dan je dobar za upiranje.

  2. #8602
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    Svaki dan je dobar za upiranje.

  3. #8603
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    - Smrt fasizmu baba
    - I tebi sinko, i tebi

  4. #8604
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    MIX 2

  5. #8605
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    Quote Originally Posted by radza-madza View Post


    MIX 2
    ...oldie but goldie...

  6. #8606
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    Tuča u kafani. Mujo i Haso prolaze pored. Ide Mujo da vidi kakva je to gužva. Vraća se razbijenog nosa. Pita ga Haso jel vidio kakva je to gužva. Kaže Mujo nije gužva, oman stignem na red

  7. #8607
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    - Kako je bilo kod doktora
    - Super,
    - Super sve je u redu
    - Da, jedino su mi se malo unutarnji organi pomaknuli
    - Kako misliš pomaknuli?
    - Doktor kaže da su mi jetra otišla u qurac
    - Smrt fasizmu baba
    - I tebi sinko, i tebi

  8. #8608
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    Žena(60) imala infarkt.U komi je videla Boga i pitala:
    -Koliko ću još živjeti?
    -30 godina.

    Kada se oporavila od infarkta ode na zatezanje lica,operiše nos,popravi zube.
    Posle toga ode na more i pojede je ajkula.

    Došla Bogu na istinu:
    -Što me ne spase od ajkule?
    -Nisam te prepoznao

  9. #8609
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    - Toliko godina imaš, a još se nisi oženio...
    - Hoćeš iskreno?
    - Kaži!
    - Nisam se oženio jer svo vreme mislim na tvoju ženu
    - MOLIM?
    - Ma bojim se da i mene ne zapadne neka takva...

  10. #8610
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    Jednog dana ulazi neki momak, bilder u autobus.
    Šofer se okreće prema njemu i kaže: “A karta?”
    Momak: “Moćni Mustafa nikad ne plaća kartu!”
    Sljedećeg dana, opet ulazi isti bilder.
    Šofer: “Karta?”
    Nakon par mjeseci sofer se isto nabildovao i pita onako dubokim glasom: “Karta!?”
    Momak: “Moćni Mustafa ne plaća kartu!”
    Proteze se sofer “A zašto moćni Mustafa nikad ne plaća kartu?”
    Momak: “Zato što Moćni Mustafa ima mjesečnu…”
    Having a parachute greatly increases your chance of surviving a long fall.
    Have a parachute.

  11. #8611
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    Bješe li '89 ili '90?

    Sent from my Redmi Note 8 using Tapatalk

  12. #8612
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    Nina majka malog sina i kaže:
    - kako si mi lijep, sine, kako si mi dobar, kako si miran, ti si najbolja beba na svijetu. Srećo i radosti moja! A tata je htio da te progutam...
    Sell the Vatican, Feed the World!

  13. #8613
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    Sent from my ONEPLUS A6013 using Tapatalk

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    Crnogorac u parku sa đevojkom ali ne može da mu se digne. Đevojka pola sata, sat vremena radi rukom ali ništa ne pomaže, pa kaže:

    - ne mogu više, umorila sam se.

    A na to će crnogorac:

    - A jel đevojko, jel se tebi to često događa?

    Izvor: Najbolji vicevi

  15. #8615
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    Mhm.
    Svaki dan je dobar za upiranje.

  16. #8616
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    Sjedi covjek u kafanu, jedna za drugom... Ubije se ka curka. Ne moze da hoda, ne moze da ustane. Ne zna sto da radi, i odluci da pozove kuma.
    -KUMEEEEE, STO RADIIIIISSSSS...
    -Spavam kume, tri sata je...
    -MOOOOLIM TE KUME DODJI ZA MENE, NE MOGU DA USTANEM, POVEDI ME KUCI KOMA SAM.
    -Aaaaaaaa, opet. Evo stizem...
    Ponese ga kum do kuce, legne ga u krevet i vrati se kuci. Kad opet ga kum zove.
    -Sto je sad kume moj?
    -KUMEEEEE, SAMO DA TI KAZEM DA SAM SE SNASAO, NE MORAS DOLAZIT
    - Smrt fasizmu baba
    - I tebi sinko, i tebi

  17. #8617
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    .


    Sent from my Redmi Note 4 using Tapatalk
    Sell the Vatican, Feed the World!

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  19. #8618
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    Muž i žena došli u bračno savjetovalište, kaže im psiholog: "Ajde da ne počinjemo s problemima i razlikama, recite mi prvo što imate zajedničko?"
    Kaže muž: "Evo, za početak, zajedničko nam je to što nijedno od nas neće da puši ..."

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  21. #8619
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    Udala se jedinica u majke o dolazi kuci u posjet roditeljima
    - Kako ti je kceri u novom domu,?
    - dobro samo ne valja što trazi od mene da mu pusim.
    - Dobro kceri nije to nista,potegni dva, tri dima i daj svekru i svkrvi neka mu oni puše..

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  23. #8620
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  24. #8621
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    [

  25. #8622
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    Dolazi muž ranije s posla, ulazi u spavaću sobu, a tamo njegova žena i švaler na gomili...
    Švaler ustaje, ćuteći se oblači i brzo izlazi. Muž zanijemio od šoka. Samo je uspio da izusti:
    - Što je ovo, ženo!?
    - I ja sam šokirana! Ni tebi "Dobar dan", ni meni "Dovidjenja "!

    Sent from my Redmi Note 4 using Tapatalk
    Sell the Vatican, Feed the World!

  26. #8623
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    Ima jedna istinita gradska priča za jednog ugostitelja kad ga je žena ufatila..
    A on skočio, jaa ne znam ko je ova žena, okle ja odje ahahah

  27. #8624
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    Veli jedan Pljevljak noćas "Džaba vam priča da je u Podgoricu zagađen vazduh, mi se u Pljevlja ne vraćamo!"

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  29. #8625
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    Koje dvije akcije igraju košarkaši sa bogoslovije?
    Pick & pop i igra na postu.

    OKOK

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